Revenge of the Empire

A poor aussie bloke, Craig Donaldson 23, thought he might take a backpacking tour of the old country, England that is. He was visiting Greenwich Park in London, when all of a sudden out of the blue he was hit by a, wait for it, he was hit in the head by a bloody boomerang. He suffered a nasty gash to the head. His assailant was a precious little short-panted kid. Talk about a case of cosmic irony, was this guy doing something wrong in his past life. The chances of that happening are about the same as me myself being hit by a flying beaver, being a canuck. 1 in a trillion chances, it goes to show you this sure is a strange world we inhabit.

I can imagine the horrible little gobsitte going home for tea, after a hard day harassing us colonial types. I bet the little rotters name is Colin, typical gobsitte name. He walks throught the door, and his proud mother bellows"O Colin, How was your day, up to anything exciting". Colin replies " O Mommy I was down at the park and saw one of those horrid colonials prowling around" Mommy " Good lord Colin are you ok, what did you?". Colin I showed him what for Mommy, I gave him a good clout around the ears with me boomerang". Mommy" By Jove Colin what a clever boy you are, after all England should be for the English, not those bloody colonial types". Colin" You got that right Mommy, can I have some pudding for afters". O those quaint British.

So my fellow colonials if you are planning a trip to jolly old England keep your wits about you and keep watching the Sky and watch out for little kids named Colin.